Dropping the F-bomb at Work
One of my favorite negotiation books is "Never Split the Difference" by Chris Voss. He talks about people dropping the F-bomb in the middle of negotiations, and it's usually as insulting as you might think. They'll say something along the lines of, "I don't think that is FAIR."
We humans invest an extraordinary amount of time contemplating if we are being treated fairly in the workplace. I've found that more often than not, people do have some legitimate basis for feeling like they're not being treated fairly. However, I recommend spending less time evaluating the level of fairness being administered to you, evaluating the situation for what it is, then taking action.
Some people don't feel like their being paid fairly. When people saying that to me, I ask them what they think they should be paid, and what information they have to back that number. Usually, the number originates from their imagination. I tell them to use salary.com and payscale.com to get a ballpark estimate of their market value. Neither tool is perfect, but they both beat "I think this number is fair." If your company won't pay you "fairly" find a company that will. Your market value is only what some company would actually pay you.
Some people don't feel like promotions are fair. We need to seek clarity regarding how promotions are earned in our organization. For every organization, It's some combination of performance, image, exposure, and qualifications. Examine those who have received promotions in your organization to see what's valued, then do likewise.
It's true that things are often not "fair." Make the decision to adapt to the situation, or put in the work to change the situation. Either way, stop dropping f-bombs.
Your Purpose Driven Career
When people ask me for career advice, I usually ask them “what impact do you want to have on the universe?” It’s a heavy question. Most folks that are unsure about their career path don’t have an answer for that question (even some folks who are sure about their career path don’t have an answer for that question). When I ask the question, I’m seeking to see if the person has discovered their purpose yet.
I believe that career paths are flexible for everyone (this is from the computer guy that now does HR), but purpose is more constant. Purpose serves as beacon for you to track to. It’s a destination that you will never fully arrive at, but will guide your journey. Purpose is not a monetary goal or job title. Purpose is the impact you will have on the universe.
Some of us want to pour all of our energy into our immediate family. Some of us want to create solutions to solve problems across the globe. Everyone’s purpose is unique and deeply personal. I don’t believe one person’s purpose is more valuable than the next person’s purpose. I do believe we all have a responsibility to discover our purpose, then commit ourselves towards it.
I was 29 years old when I discovered my purpose. I was in my first HR role. I remember being in a succession planning meeting where there were decisions made that would significantly impact careers, but there was not much rationale to some of the decisions. It was in that moment when I realized how much impact, positive or negative, HR could have on the organization. I resolved in that moment, that my purpose would be to have a positive impact on as many careers as possible.
Discovering my purpose was like a light bulb turning on. For others, the process is more like a crescendo. If you haven’t discovered your purpose yet, it’s time to schedule a “by-yourself meeting” to give it some thought. The universe is counting on you.